“The grass isn’t greener on the other side. It’s greener
where you water it.” -Unknown
“It is often possible to get greater enjoyment from what we
are already doing, rather than try to find something else.” –L. Don Siebet
“The Foolish man seeks happiness in the distance, the wise
grows it under his feet.” –James Oppenheim
You may have heard a couple of these quotes before. The
reality is, many times we get tired of what we are currently doing in life and
then we halt all operations to go find something new. And halting doesn’t always
mean we halt the physical aspect, but it could mean we halt the mental aspect.
Meaning, we just shut down mentally and avoid, be mean or negative toward the
current relationship or task. We cease using positive energy toward developing
the old.
New means passion and excitement. That sounds very fulfilling
and fun. But, don’t new things get old at some point? Don’t new things eventually
get boring? Think about a new hit on the radio that you love. You play it 100
times over on full blast and swear that you could never get sick of this one.
This song has a great beat and you can relate to every single word this singer
is saying. But, after the 200th play, you find that you are quite sick
of the song. How could that be? You absolutely loved this one! Then, one day,
as you are scanning the radio stations in traffic you hear that song. Your beat
just got a remix and it is mixed with an old song from “back in the day” when
you were growing up! This once boring song with a little remix was all you needed
to be re-sparked before you found yourself singing at the top of your lungs in
the car again.
Often, most everything that we want is right in front of us.
It doesn’t take an all-out manhunt of finding someone or something new to find
happiness. Happiness is often about rekindling the passion and spark with what
you do have. So, go ahead, create that funky remix.
Here is an example of adding in a remix at work. In the work
force you may find that you are sick of your job. And while there are many
reasons that it is a good idea to look for other work, there are also many
reasons why you should or could stay and be happy doing it. Try taking on a new
project on a topic that interests you, apply for an advancement or take on
tasks that would align you with that advancement, get involved in work
functions, and talk to more positive people at work.
Sometimes, relationships with partners get boring. We all go
through a phase in life where we feel the spice is gone or the passion is drifting
away. Instead of putting in energy walking away from this person, use your
energy to add excitement. Talk together about the past and what added life to
your relationship or look into each other’s bucket lists and start knocking off
some goals together. Listen to each
other. A great book on rekindling lost passion comes from Gary Chapman’s The
Five Love Languages.
Whatever it is in life that you have, before you walk away
from it and expend your energy on finding something new, first channel all that
energy, positivity and time into what you currently have. Being at a job for 5
years and choosing to put positive energy into it before leaving might yield
passion, advancement and a greater sense of self-esteem and confidence. These
are the factors that lead to happiness.
Remember, if you are off to find something new, it will at
one point get old, and you will have to put just as much time and energy into
that relationship, job or thing that you are being requested to do now. Relationships
can get boring, work can get boring, and songs on the radio can get boring.
Instead of walking away from your favorite person, career or song, create a
remix.
This week’s goal: Find ways to add in a little mix to the areas
within your life that you feel passion or excitement is slipping away from.
Dr. Jaime Kulaga is a Licensed Mental Health Counselor and Motivational Speaker. She is the author of "The SuperWoman's Guide to Super Fulfillment: Step-by-Step Strategies to Create Work-Life Balance." She is the inspirational founder of the nationally known SuperWoman Workshops. Dr. Kulaga has been featured internationally for her expertise in Work-Life Balance. http://www.mindfulrehab.com
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