5 Reasons Why Saying "No," Works.

 5 Reasons Why Saying "No," Works

 

It isn’t always easy to say “No.” Whether fear, guilt, or any other reason stops us, the reality is, the word “Yes” has this great way of flying out of our trap with little thought behind it. Although we see women as harboring guilt and fears about saying “No,” the truth is, both men and women struggle to use this simple, but powerful, 2 letter word.

Here are 5 reasons why saying “No,” works:

1.      You get to focus on your current goals.

By saying “No” to additional roles and tasks you allow yourself to focus on your current goals. Often, small tasks, given to us by “Big” people, quickly turn into barriers toward our current goals and consequently hinder our progress. For example, if a boss offers you a project to take on and it does not offer much incentive for your position or could hinder your progress toward other goals that he/she previously created with you, you might want to decline the offer.

Instead of telling a boss “No, I can’t do this, I don’t have time,” turn this moment into an opportunity for you. Schedule a meeting with your boss and bring to their awareness what goals you are already striving toward. During this meeting show them your current progress, how far you have come and the importance of successfully completing the goals already in progress.

Having too many goals and minimal attention provided to each, you will find increase stress, less confidence and could quickly burnout. As you complete your goals already in progress, you are going to feel more empowered, self-confidence and excited for the next challenge.

Saying “No” works because you can focus on your current goals.  

 

2.      You maintain your credibility.

By taking on an opportunity that you don’t have time for, you risk underperforming, thus hurting your reputation and credibility with a superior, friend or loved one. You want to make sure that if you choose to take on a task you are committed to excellence, whether it is in business or your personal life. If you can’t commit to a top performance, saying “Yes” will come around to hurt you in the end. Worse, sometimes saying “yes” hurts what you have worked months or years for, like trust or status. Saying “yes” not only jeopardizes your current goal progress, but also, if you perform poor on the new task you could be seen as not competent in a certain area.

What can really hurt our credibility is when we say “yes” to a task, and then back out later. You may get to a point in a project where it becomes too much work and you can’t balance. When you say “yes” to something, people are putting their trust in you. In this case, if you pull out of the task, people may not see you as trustworthy and thus you lose credibility. You may also risk losing future opportunities they could offer you.

 Saying “No” works because you maintain your credibility.

 

3.      You free up time for bigger opportunities.

Often people say “Yes” to taking on extra tasks because they think they will not be offered more opportunities in the future. If you politely and respectfully decline opportunities, those same people, in the future, will offer you another opportunity. People like people that they can trust and believe are honest about their commitments. Also, as you use your time to complete current goals, you will find upon completion the next door opens. This door will offer more opportunities and potentially even some more rewarding ones.

If you truly fear saying “No” because of the potential loss of opportunity, then instead of putting opportunity off on others, start creating it yourself. If you want more opportunities go find them. You will find them all around you. You can’t simply say, “I wish I had more opportunity” and then sit there and complain that you don’t.

You have to diligently work to make your mind see more opportunities than problems in your life. Look at everything in your life as having the potential to move you forward. Think about the situation above regarding the employee who did not want to take on another task. She/He could have complained but instead saw this as an opportunity to show their current goals and successes.

Saying “No” works because you free up time for bigger opportunities.

 

4.      Saying “No” shows self-discipline.  

As we say “No” to taking on tasks that we can’t or shouldn’t add to our plate, we are disciplining ourselves. Saying “No” teaches us to avoid impulsivity in decision making and also to put our priorities in place. As we say “No,” we are teaching our minds to think before we act. If we think getting in over our heads with multiple tasks and projects can be overwhelming, think about how saying “yes” to major purchases or life changing events could harmful to your mental, physical and life state, even more so. Discipline yourself by making a habit of thinking before you say “Yes.”

Saying “No” works because it shows self-discipline.

 

 

5.      Saying “No” conveys the ability to set boundaries.  

As you say “No,” you are also setting boundaries with people who think they can walk all over you, take from you, or mistake your kindness for you being a doormat. By freeing yourself from taking on everyone else’s tasks, you are allowing yourself to advance your life and/or family. You will also find more overall life fulfillment when you are pursuing and focusing on  your personal goals and desires.  

Saying “No” works because it conveys the ability to set boundaries.

 

 Dr. Jaime Kulaga is the author of Type "Superwoman: Finding the LIFE in Work-Life Balance - A Self-Searching Book for Women". She is the inspirational founder of the nationally known SuperWoman Workshops. Dr. Kulaga has been featured in Forbes, Glamour, Self and Prevention magazines as well as the national show Daytime for her expertise in Work-Life Balance.
http://www.mindfulrehab.com