Today’s tip is on being more realistic.
Fear becomes a pattern and habit. Fear can become a way of life. Fear may be the underlying essence or barrier to fulfillment. When it comes to women, we tend to fear feelings of guilt or loss of something. How different would our lives or perspectives in decision making be if we did not fear losing something; losing likability, a lover, a friend, respect, our job, children, etc.?
When it comes to business, according to Joanna Barsh and Susie Cranston, authors of How Remarkable Women Lead, fear drives women to set an extremely high bar of standards that would stop anyone speaking up in a position. Plus, they say that women tend to overestimate their potential for unhappiness in situations and thus this inhibits us from trying new things.
Okay, so, women set a crazy high bar of standards when it comes to almost everything we do, which deters us to begin with, but then we support that even more by telling ourselves that if we take a leap and fail, our unhappiness will even be more unhappy than we would actually be….? Whew! Man we self-sabotage ourselves sometimes!
I suppose it all goes back to one essence, fear. You can knock down your fears when you set more realistic expectations in life, love and business. If you want to try something new or speak up, and you find that fear is telling you how unhappy you will be if you fail or you find yourself setting crazy high expectations; here is where I want you to do:
Examine some similar past decisions you have made, some of which you succeeded at, and some you failed at. Then begin to determine whether or not the unhappiness was as bad as you thought it was going to be when you actually did fail and also determine if the expectations you had once created actually needed to be that high. A reflection of your past experiences will help create a more realistic perception of your future.
This week, be more realistic with yourself so that you can create new opportunities.